written by Matty Pipes
If I've learned anything from eight seasons of RuPaul's Drag Race, it's that sewing and fashion construction are essential to a drag queen's life. Runway styles are too expensive and department store threads are too common. No, if you want Pageantry--with a capital P--you're going to have to make it yourself. So when I heard Edith Head's patternmaker's estate was going up for sale today, I could think of nothing but the throngs of queens battling over what's probably the most iconic silver-screen costume collection known to man!
For those of you who don't know Edith Head and have lost the will to Google, she was the premiere costume designer to Tinseltown for almost six decades. She's been nominated for 35 Academy Awards and taken home seven. Almost every major movie from the '30s to the '70s has her mark on it. In a word: BOSS.
Now if there's anything a drag queen loves more than a beat face, it's a spot-on diva reference. How chic, to not only be dressed like Marylin Monroe from "All About Eve," but to be able to say your dress is an exact replica. SLAY QUEEN! But unfortunately, most of Edith Head's patterns and designs are in museums, galleries and studio archives. I'm sorry to bust your bedazzled bubble, but here's a list of a few iconic Edith Head pieces you probably won't find for sale.
Sorry, girl!
No recreating the opening "Think Pink!" sequence for you. Sorry, Girl.
Grace Kelly moment Not On Fleek. Sorry, Girl.
You: "I'm ready for my close up, Mr. Devil."
Mr. Devil: "Not in the knock off, you're not! Sorry, Girl."
Hey, Big Spender! Speeeeeeeeeeeeeend a little time pausing the movie so I can guesstimate the width of that neckline. Sorry, Girl.
Sabrina - 1954
What will you wear to Wimbledon?! Sorry, Girl.
Better call off that bulk order of black paper mache crows. Sorry, Girl.
What's Christmas going to be without your Mrs. Claus realness?! Sorry, Girl.
Better hold that mink close to your body so no one sees the stitching. Sorry, Girl.